Whether you’re single or in a relationship, self-love sets the foundation for so many things. Often those people who have learned to sacrifice for others, find it so much easier to love and focus on other people rather than themselves.
Unfortunately, not loving yourself can lead to a host of issues, including lack of self confidence, depression, and anxiety—and it doesn’t help the other people in your life either, even if you’re trying to put them first. If you’re having trouble learning to love yourself, here are a few ways to connect with yourself a little better.
Set Boundaries
When you don’t feel confident in yourself, it’s easy to be pushed around by others. Many people assume that if you don’t stop them from doing something you find uncomfortable, it’s a green light to keep doing it forever. If you’re uncomfortable with your friend or sibling breezing through your door without knocking, or your boss demanding unpaid over time, but you don’t say anything, they assume it is okay.
Setting boundaries isn’t mean or hurtful, it is simply establishing your comfort zone. Your day to day activities shouldn’t make you feel uncomfortable, or worse fill you with dread.
It’s okay to tell your friend or sibling that they need to knock first—and keep the door locked just to make sure. It’s okay to tell your boss that unpaid hours are unappreciated and frankly illegal and that your days off are yours.
Banish Negative Self Talk
We are often our own worst critics. It’s easy to focus on our flaws and forget that there is plenty of good things about ourselves as well. Our internal monologue is running through our minds at nearly every waking hour. You might as well make that inner voice a pleasant one to be around.
Positive self-talk means changing even your critical statements into positive ones. Instead of thinking to yourself, “I suck at math and I’m never going to pass this stupid class!” or “I wish I wish prettier.” You can change that to, “Math is challenging for me, but if I study hard I can pass.” and “I love myself and a
Not liking your body or other aspects of yourself is also common, but learning to love yourself no matter what is incredibly important. Even if there are things you wish you could change about your body, there are probably things you wouldn’t want to change either. Eyes that work, legs that carry you places, two hands, are all things we tend to take for granted. Learn to love your body for what it is, and if you can, take steps to change what you don’t care for.
Remember, loving yourself FIRST is important!
Are there ways you’ve learned or are working to fall in love with yourself? Let me know in the comments!
xo Yinka
Photography: Norman Oates
Amazing article, i’m sure everyone can relate to this subject!
we would like to share this post on our Facebook page if you don’t mind !
The handy journal
I agree with setting boundaries. If you do not set them, you could blow up (on someone).
Beautiful post and above all learning to set boundaries is extremely important for self love. Boundaries can help eliminate negativity in your life
I think accepting myself as I am is one lesson I have learnt to love myself. And cutting myself some slack.
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This is so good! I’m on a self love journey too, and I personally need to focus on the banishing negative talk bit.
We all do it! I think it’s important ro recognize it and try to change the conversation to a positive one.